Tag Archives: teens

When is a soda not a soda?

My 14-year-old daughter stopped at the dep on her way home from school last week, looking for a snack after a lengthy extra-curricular activity. The depanneur (convenience store) is right next to the school and very familiar with the teen students in their plaid kilt uniforms. 

Smirnoff Raspberry Soda

Deceptive packaging makes this look like a regular soda.

She bought a can of low-calorie raspberry soda and hopped on the bus home. But the soda tasted strange. Way too sweet. So she checked the ingredient list and was shocked to find it contained 4% alcohol. 

“Um, Mom? I bought alcohol by mistake.”

Turns out what she actually bought was a Smirnoff cooler with a raspberry & soda flavour. The Smirnoff label is very prominent but like the average 14-year-old, she didn’t know or recognize the brand name. Everything else about the packaging (see photo) suggests this was a soft drink. 

Initially, we laughed off her error and poured it down the sink. I told her how glad I was that she told me about it. She wasn’t at fault and certainly wasn’t in trouble.

Then I got upset. And the more I thought about it, the angrier I got. But not with her.

First of all, I was upset that the dep employee sold alcohol to a 14-year-old wearing the familiar high school uniform (she even had on a hoodie with the school name). She wasn’t challenged or asked for identification. Moreover, the product wasn’t in a beer and cooler fridge, surrounded by other products obviously containing alcohol; it was in a six-pack on a shelf next to some bananas and snack foods. 

Mostly, however, I was upset about the packaging for this product. It’s easy to see how a teenager unfamiliar with the Smirnoff brand might think it’s a soda. The most obvious marketing messages in this packaging design are about the low calorie nature of the beverage and the raspberry soda flavour. Even if a young person was deliberately seeking alcohol, it makes it seem so benign. And the sugary sweet taste promoted by the beverage suggests it’s designed for young drinkers.

The whole mixup seems particularly onerous in the wake of the death from alcohol poisoning last month of another 14-year-old girl from Laval. Athena Gervais had reportedly been drinking a high sugar alcoholic beverage called FCKD UP purchased from a nearby depanneur. Laval-based Groupe Geloso, which manufactured the drink, announced soon after that it was stopping production and pulling it from shelves. Similar to the American beverage, Four Loko, the drinks are very high in alcohol and caffeine – and both brands appeal to youth.

It seems the problem is bigger than just those one or two particular drinks. Can we address the way packaging and marketing specifically appeals to underage drinkers? How it is deliberately promoted to seem like candy or energy drinks or soda as if it were completely safe for all?

The day after this incident, I went over t0 the depanneur where my daughter bought this drink. Full of mama rage, I confronted the owner. To his credit, he was shocked and horrified and apologized immediately. He recognized that placing these drinks next to snack foods and away from the rest of the alcohol could be confusing to students and pledged to move them right away. And he promised to reinforce to all his employees that the legal age for alcohol consumption in Quebec is 18, and they must demand identification to prove their age. My 14-year-old could easily pass for older, but she was wearing a high school uniform and thus clearly no older than 17. She claims the worker showed zero interest in what she was purchasing. 

I was satisfied with the owner’s response and proud of my daughter for speaking up. But I remain concerned about this kind of misleading advertising. There are many reasons why alcohol consumption can be dangerous for teens, from alcohol poisoning to addiction, heightened risk of assault, drinking and driving, and decreased judgment. This kind of marketing is unethical and it’s our kids who pay the price.

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Stranger danger online: What parents need to know

The recent spate of news stories about young girls going missing in the Montreal area has a lot of parents worried. The police have said they have evidence that the girls, who were living in a Laval group home, may have been lured away by gangs for sexual exploitation. The disappearances have been linked to the use of social media to target young, vulnerable teens. Five girls have gone missing over the last month, and four have been located. 17-year-old Vanessa Ticas still has not been found.

SextingNow I have always argued that most kids, most of the time, are far more at risk from the people they know than strangers on line. The U.S. Department of Justice estimates that abductions by strangers account for only 1% of kidnappings. Far more common are kidnapping by parents in a custody dispute, or someone else related to the family. When it comes to sexual abuse, it is estimated that 8 out of 10 abused children know their abuser offline.

Kids are far more likely to be harmed online by their peers, whether its through bullying or the non-consensual sharing of sexual images. However, there are clearly many risks online for children and teens. When you mix kids and adults, anonymity, spontaneity and the incredible power of digital technology, people are likely to get hurt. So what can parents do to help keep their kids safe from strangers online?

Start young. The best strategy is to begin age-appropriate conversations about the power and challenges of online tools from the time kids are very young. It’s much harder to introduce supervision, rules and consequences with a 14-year-old. Children get online as soon as they can click or swipe, and many start with gaming accounts, progressing to email, messaging and social media. Your young children and preteens should ask permission before they open any accounts, and should share passwords with parents. Sit next to them to configure privacy settings. Don’t know how? Google is a user manual for everything – show them you are interested in learning about these tools.

Teach online “street smarts.” They need to be told over and over that nothing they do online should ever be considered private, whether it’s a text message to your best friend, an email to a classmate, or a picture sent to a boyfriend. They need to understand that even though their computer feels private , it’s actually very public and they should behave accordingly. Explain repeatedly how easy it is for someone to “pass” as someone else, whether it’s an older man passing as a teen boy, a student pretending to be a teacher, or a stranger pretending to be a friend.

Be frank about the risks. Parenting in 2016 means putting aside your embarrassment and addressing sex online. Kids today have access to the kinds of sexualized images adults couldn’t legally get their hands on 10 years ago. You are kidding yourself if you think your kid hasn’t seen porn online, accidentally in a pop-up, or through a search. They need to understand the meaning of sharing sexualized images of themselves or others. And both young girls and boys need to be told that others may try to “groom” them for exploitation by being charming or flattering, promising gifts or extra attention. This resource on sexual trafficking of kids by gangs has some great tips. This document from BC is also very useful.

Set rules. Establish consequences. Follow through. If you don’t want your teen using video chat in a room with a closed door, make that clear and follow through. If you want your child to notify you by text whenever they change locations (going to a movie, going to a friend’s house, etc.), make it a condition of owning a cellphone.

Freedom is a privilege to be earned through consistent, responsible behaviour. I’ve said it before, and I believe this is true online and off. Having access to wifi, smartphones, iPads and computers is an incredible privilege. If your child wants privacy from you online, they need to earn it in increments by showing good judgement.

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Teens recommend educational apps

teens recommend educational appsThey may spend plenty of time on Tumblr, Snapchat and Instagram, but many of today’s kids are also learning to use digital technologies in responsible ways for creative, productive projects as well.

This month’s educational column of Montreal Families Magazine was co-written by my 14-year-old twin daughters, Sophie and Alex. They list and describe some helpful apps kids can for school. Check out the article here. Show your kids how to put French verbs right at their fingertips, turn their smartphones or tablets into scientific calculators, and even compress the amount of data they use (reducing your monthly bills in the process).

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